Tuesday, 8 July 2014
From Script To... Internet
Apparently the BBC are about to launch a new Doctor Who competition. It is open to anyone (of any age in any country). Only condition is that you must have had a script accepted and filmed for Series 9.
Four lucky winners will be selected to have their scripts left in the back of a taxi and published in their entirety on the internet a full two months before broadcast.
A BBC spokesman is purported to have said:
"We're getting so much better at spoilers, we needed to take things up a level. To begin with, it was just photos of Jimmy Vee having a fag in costume on some Cardiff industrial estate. Guest stars and extras then started tweeting important plot points. We slowly began publishing photos and releasing clips that gave away masses of information. We didn't think we could beat having a whole un-broadcast episode released on DVD the week before transmission - but now we will be giving some lucky writers to opportunity to have the entire plots of their stories spoiled. 2015 is, of course, the 10th anniversary of the return of Doctor Who to our screens - so we are also working on a deal allowing the final episode of the series to be released free with every packet of Cornflakes* the week before the series starts. I'm sure you'll agree it is much more exciting than getting Matt Smith back for a multi-Doctor story..."
Of course, we all know who is behind this latest BBC spoiler screw-up, the Machiavelli manipulating Steven Moffat's downfall from within in order to seize power for himself. Marcelo Camarago? An anagram of Mark Gatiss (only with some different letters...).
* Other breakfast cereals are available.